My niece and nephew

Thought I would share a little bit of why my heart melts for adoption. My sister, Heather and her husband Tom, who I owe so much credit to for helping me get to where I am, adopted 2 children from China. Ella was about 18 months old when we got to bring this precious girl into our lives 5 years ago, and Ian was 3 1/2 when they brought this beautiful boy home not quite a year ago. Both are so full of life and we cannot imagine our lives without them. It makes me tear up all the time when I think about the fact that if Tom and Heather wouldn't have had a heart for adoption and followed that heart, that my wonderful niece and nephew could possibly still be orphaned.

After they brought Ella home, Kenton and I talked about how we knew we would do that someday. So, I want to thank my sister and brother-in-law for following their hearts which eventually put a little tug in ours.

 I mean...look at their pictures. Can you imagine them as orphans? I sure can't!

Words of a dear friend

My friend Becky and her husband are in Ethiopia meeting there son who we hope will be able to come home soon. These are her words from her posting today. I just love her heart.

"On Friday, we visited three different orphanages and I haven't stopped thinking about them since.

I'm not going to describe to you the conditions or the smell or the sadness. I really do believe that the caregivers in these homes are doing their very best and I don't want to make it sound like they aren't trying. And honestly, I saw some of the same things within the walls of the orphanages as I did out in the middle of town.

Runny noses, bare feet, and torn clothes are just normal here. These things don't indicate a child's happiness or a reveal family's status. Most children here just don't have much.

But here's what got to me about the children in the orphanages - they think they don't matter.

Within seconds of pulling through the gate at the boys' orphanage the frenzied excitement told us how much they LOVE visitors. And the girls, oh those sweet girls, clung to our waits and held our hands tight as soon as hurried introductions had been made.

Please, listen to my song.
Please, play futbol.
Please, take my photo.
Please, help me read my school lesson and play a hand-clap game with me.

Please. Notice. Me.

At ten or twelve years old, these children are still hopeful. They are thrilled that 15 ferenge came to see them and I do believe that they feel our love - that on some level they know that we care about them.

But one morning, these little girls and boys are going to wake up and say to themselves, "You know what? I. Don't. Matter. What difference does it make whether or not I get an education? Who will care if I disappear? Who will I disappoint if I become a prostitute?"

This realization may come gradually - slowly building in their minds each day - or it may hit like a ton of bricks. Either way, the day a child asks WHO CARES? and the answer is NOBODY is the day that child's life changes for worse.

The main - and perhaps the only - difference between a child living in the orphanage and a child living in a tin or mud home is that the child living in the orphanage has no family. No mother or father, aunt or uncle, grandma or grandpa to say, "I value you. You are important to me."

This difference is HUGE.

Since we've been here, Mark and I have asked each other often, "So, what do we do?"

I've said it before, and I believe it even more now, adoption is not the solution. Many orphans (dare I say most?) are not eligible for adoption and many of the children who I saw on Friday will never, ever experience a family. But somehow, we've got to show these children that they matter - that they are important to someone and that someone cares deeply what happens to them.

Thankfully, I saw evidence all around the orphanages that showed me that other families who have come before me believe this also. Families who met these electric children and said, "You know what? YOU. DO. MATTER."

A library full of books donated to the boys - I value your education.
New computers with internet - I want you to learn about the world.
New playground equipment for the girls - It matters to me that you have fun.
A box of new shoes delivered to the toddlers - I care about your health and safety.

I know these are just things. Material possessions that will one day fade and be destroyed, but they send a message that is so much greater, a message that is perhaps not conveyed to these kids in any other way.

I wish I could hold each of their faces in my hands, look into their eyes, and say, "You are of utmost importance. Learn. Grow. Thrive. Be something."

But I know I can't - so I will continue to support projects that send soccer balls and buy goats and provide school uniforms and will trust that my Heavenly Father will use these gifts to capture children's hearts and enfold them into His family as his very own valuable, precious children."

Why Adoption? Why Uganda?

I wish I could put in writing exactly how I'm feeling, but every time I try, I end up erasing it and for all you English majors out there, I am not a good writer. So, please forgive me. I am going to attempt to explain why Kenton and I feel like adoption is for our family. The official start was when Kenton and I were sitting on the couch, sipping our coffee and reading our bibles. I then turned to him and said, "I think its time we really start thinking about adoption." I was so overwhellmed with emotion that I couldn't contain the tears running down my face. God has placed a huge desire in my heart to raise one of His children as my own and I could not shake that feeling. We have known for a while that we would eventually adopt, but we just didn't know when and where from. Well, we feel like now is the time and that Uganda is the place. First off, let me try to give details as to where God has taken my heart. I have always known that there was a great need for adoption all around the world but recently, I felt like God has shown me just a little bit of what His heart feels like when He sees His children cry, starve and die alone without a  mom and dad to comfort them. This is something that I cannot just pass off as a temporary feeling. I believe we were called to give a child a family, hope, opportunities and lots of love; with God's help I know we are perfectly capable of raising another child like he/she came from my own womb. I can't explain it but my heart literally aches to hold and comfort a child that has never heard "Its ok, Mommy is here." Every time I tend to my girls when they are sick or hurt, I always think there are millions upon millions of children who will never hear those words from a mom. I have been broken over that. I know it is not new news. There has and always will be an orphan crisis but I feel like my eyes and my heart have finally been opened and that opening became a desire. Don't get me wrong. We are not pretending to solve any kind of crisis. We are just a couple who is obeying what God has called us to do, and that is, to take 1 child (for now) and give him/her a family and a home.

We chose Uganda because there is a huge need there. This is a country recovering from war, AIDS and poverty and with over 50% of the population being under the age of 15, there is an obvious orphan crisis there. There had not been many adoptions out of this country due to a requirement that one had to live and foster the child in the country for 3 years before the child could legally be adopted but in the last couple years,there has been made a way for parents to be granted legal guardianship and then the adoption can be finalized in the US. This is a relatively new program for most agencies but from what I've read, things are going pretty well. However, we are fully aware that anything can change due to the nature of the country and the nature of adoption. This will cause us to be fully dependant on God and allow Him to take control and I see that as a great opportunity to draw closer and closer to Him during the process. We have surrendered our own agenda and any expectations that we may have in our mind of how we think it should all play out. For example, we originally wanted an infant girl, but that may change down the road due to the need for boys to be adopted. We know God will be the one to place a child (or 2...hehehe) in our family. He cares way more for His children than we do and we trust Him to work out the who and how old.

So that is a very tiny peace of my heart. Hope it helps with the why. We invite you to join us on our journey and ask for your prayers as we expect a crazy, sometimes scary, faith filled road to find our child.